Charlotte - Pride and Prejudice Continues Page 11
“It is, I am afraid a matter of time. We just have to sit it out, until the old girl gives in!”
This made Charlotte laugh, she had never heard Lady Catherine spoken of so irreverently, and it amused her. She wondered how Mr Collins would react if he had overheard and decided it was for the best he had indeed not.
She rose and rang the bell for coffee, “I think it’s time the gentlemen joined us.”
The evening passed in such a relaxing way, Charlotte could not remember a time like it, except amongst her family. The familial feeling seemed to spread to all including Mr Collins who was smiling and laughing as though he had no cares in the world, and Charlotte was very pleased to see this change. She learnt a lot from Mr Abbot about Europe that night, as she had never travelled and for most of her life England had been at War in Europe she did not think it likely that she would and she was engrossed in his tales. They were punctuated by Mrs Abbot interjecting a correction here and there, which only heightened the atmosphere and produced more laughter at Mr Abbot’s wanton exaggeration of the strange Europeans and their habits. She was also pleased to note that Colonel Fitzwilliam seemed relaxed and to be enjoying himself; she was so grateful to him and wished for an opportunity of enquiring as to whether he had spoken to his aunt yet or not.
That said opportunity presented itself when their guests were taking their leave.
Colonel Fitzwilliam drew Charlotte aside as he put on his great coat, “I am afraid that my dining here tonight will indeed force my hand and I will have to account for myself to my aunt on the morrow, I am sure Mrs Collins. Nevertheless, pray, do not fret. All will be well, I promise you that.” He reached out, took her hand, and kissed it while staring into her eyes meaningfully.
She stood speechless, her heart pounding, breathing impossible and could only find the power to nod that she understood. He was gone before she came to her senses and realised Mr Collins was speaking to her.
“I said, that was a pleasant evening.” he repeated.
“Yes it was. They are all such good people. We are blessed, are we not, Mr Collins to have such friends?”
She did not wait for a reply but climbed the stairs to her room and bid Mr Collins good night from the landing.
Sleep would not come however, and she paced the floor in thought. She was worried for Colonel Fitzwilliam, and wondered how his aunt would react in the morning.
She decided to hunt down some hot chocolate, so she crept out of her room and down the stairs. As she reached the last stair it creaked, she winced and hesitated not wishing to wake anyone.
Mr Collins however, was not asleep and the sound drew him from his book room. He stood staring at his wife, her form visible through her nightgown and robe. The sight of her clearly stirred something in him and he took a step towards her. She could see he was aroused and his breathing shallow as his eyes drank her in. He took another step towards her, his meaning clear.
“Charlotte.” he said, his voice husky with desire and as his eyes locked with hers, she began to feel a desire for him stirring inside her too.
“William.” she answered. He raised his eyebrow. She nodded, turned, and led the way back to her room.
17
The next morning brought new sensations to Charlotte. She had never had a fire ignite in her belly like she had experienced the night before while making love with Mr Collins and it was the first time she had enjoyed being with her husband in such a way. She felt so agitated at the thought; she did not know whether to feel pleased or shocked. After examining her feelings while she lay still in bed she decided to be pleased. Their marriage could be for a long duration and it was better to remove as much of what was undesirable as was possible. He had behaved like a different man altogether. He had been aroused before but had never been in such a passion, he had devoured her with kisses and was quite the gentle lover, very different from the fumbling oaf that he usually was. She smiled at the remembrance and wondered what could have possibly wrought such a change in him. She felt him stir beside her and she froze in place, not wishing to wake him. However, he was already awake.
Waking up next to Charlotte pleased him, the scent of her hair overwhelming his senses and awakening his passions, although just as overpowering was his conscience and the knowledge that he was going against his patroness’s wishes. He laid still, not wishing to move and disturb his sleeping wife, thinking about their predicament and not for the first time he questioned the wisdom of her ladyship’s advice and the folly of following it.
* * *
The Collinses rose late and when Charlotte descended the stairs she was greeted with a jubilant smile from Mrs Higgs as she announced their breakfast was waiting for them in the dining room. Charlotte merely blushed, went to the dining room, and helped herself to ham and eggs as it dawned on her how hungry she was. She poured tea for herself and Mr Collins and watched him eat with as much gusto as usual, cramming more food than was necessary into his mouth at a time. She looked down at her plate in confusion and began to eat wondering to where the man who had made love to her last night had disappeared. Here breakfasting with her was the same Mr Collins as before, she same one she had married. She was puzzled and a little irritated with herself. Of course, he is the same man! she thought berating herself, What on earth did you expect?
She was suddenly angry with herself and did not wish to finish her breakfast. She had allowed the man who was responsible for their current predicament to make love to her and she did not put any obstacles in his way nor did she refuse him. She had given in to a moment’s passion instead of standing her ground. She viciously stabbed a piece of ham on her plate in frustration but could not bring herself to eat it.
She wanted to scream, but her attention was drawn back to Mr Collins who taking a gulp of his tea, rose from the table.
“My dear, I pray you will excuse my hasty departure this morning, but I fear I must attend to the business I was engaged in before I was so joyously interrupted last night.” He raised his eyebrows suggestively and blushed as he left the room.
Charlotte threw her napkin down on the table continuing to haul herself over the coals mentally, What did you expect? For him to be an entirely different man in the morning? For him to suddenly turn into some dashing hero? To turn into someone like Colonel Fitzwilliam?
The thought hit her with the force of a horse at full gallop and she sat wide-eyed and numb as realisation dawned on her. She was attracted to Colonel Fitzwilliam and it was the close contact with him the night before as he kissed her hand that had prevented her from sleeping and had aroused her passion.
She stood up abruptly and the chair almost fell back behind her onto the rug. Colonel Fitzwilliam! she repeated over and over in her head. She could not breathe. She wanted air and she rushed to collect her bonnet and pelisse and almost ran out of the front door.
She had not gone more than three hundred yards from her front door when she ran into the very person she wished to avoid the most; Colonel Fitzwilliam.
Her distress was plain to see and he grew concerned as he walked up to her.
“Mrs Collins, are you well?” he enquired.
“Yes, thank you Colonel, I am just out of sorts this morning that is all, I assure you.” She looked about her eager for a means of escape.
“Oh dear, got out of the wrong side of the bed?” he smiled disarmingly.
“Yes I suppose so.” Her breathing was shallow and she felt faint but forced herself to stand strong and face the man, after all, he had done no wrong.
“Come, Mrs Collins, you do seem ill. Allow me to escort you home.”
She could not think of a reason to refuse him and so she reluctantly returned to the parsonage with Colonel Fitzwilliam beside her.
As they entered the hall Mr Collins came out of his book room to greet them, “Colonel Fitzwilliam, I confess myself surprised to see you this morning. However, you are here and I will not discourage you.”
Charlotte blushed at her husband’s d
iscourtesy and asked the Colonel if he would take tea. He replied that he would and she led him to the sitting room.
Mr Collins lingered near the door, “I must beg your forgiveness Colonel. I am afraid that I have urgent business to attend to but I am sure you can content yourself with the company of my dear lady wife.” He smirked at her and again she wondered to where the man from last night had vanished.
“Indeed Mr Collins, I shall be most content to visit with your wife and perhaps if you finish your business while I am still here you will join us also?”
Mr Collins laughed nervously, promised he would join them if he finished soon, and left them alone with the door open, much to Charlotte’s immediate relief.
She resisted the urge to pace the floor, rang for tea, and chose to sit as far away from the Colonel as she possibly could.
He looked at her with a puzzled expression on his face but decided not to press the matter. Perhaps she and Mr Collins have quarrelled and it would be best to leave well alone. He thought.
Once the tea had been brought in with a freshly baked fruitcake he began to speak of what he had come to see her about. “Mrs Collins, you remember what we spoke of last night?”
Remembering last night was not something Charlotte wished to do and she paled at her own shameful thoughts and realisations. She managed to seat herself, after handing tea to the Colonel, without spilling her own.
The Colonel took her silence as a sign to continue. “As you may well imagine my aunt did indeed accost me this morning.” he laughed and expected her to also, but she simply looked at him paler than before. “Really Mrs Collins, drink some tea and have some cake, you are looking most ill indeed.” He stood to cut her some cake.
She took the proffered slice and reluctantly ate some, her throat was dry and she had difficulty swallowing but he did not witness her distress as he returned to his seat. She drank some tea to enable her to swallow and it brought tears to her eyes.
Colonel Fitzwilliam looked at her with pity, “Oh Mrs Collins, how you must be suffering!”
Indeed, if only you knew, she thought avoiding his gaze.
He sat watching her for a moment as she attempted to compose herself.
“My predicament this morning was unenviable to say the least.”
Charlotte looked up at him in surprise, realising he meant he had spoken to Lady Catherine finally.
“Mrs Collins, I apologise most profusely. If the language my aunt used with me this morning was the same that she used speaking to yourself and Mr Collins, then indeed I am grieved. I am mortified.” he paused, a frown on his face, “I never thought my aunt could speak with such venom. I am no longer surprised at my cousin Darcy’s reaction to her letter either.”
Charlotte suddenly remembered that Lady Catherine had written a letter to Mr Darcy disparaging his marriage to Lizzy, which had resulted in her ladyship being denied the right to set foot onto Darcy land.
He rallied himself, straightened up in his chair, and looked her in the eye. “I will not insult you by relaying the particulars Mrs Collins and I confess I do not have the stomach to do so. It would cause me pain to grieve you.”
She wished he would not look at her so intensely; she blushed and looked down at her cup and saucer.
“You know, I am sure, that I said all I could on your behalf.” He stood, placed his cup and saucer on the table, and began to pace the room, “I believe at times I could not hold my temper and I fully matched her venomous words. It is a scene I am glad no one was witness to. She is an obstinate woman Mrs Collins. Obstinate!” He stopped, opening and closing his fist until his anger passed.
Charlotte stayed quietly watching him, allowing him to say his peace without interruption.
“Finally she conceded that she might have overreacted somewhat.” here he let out a bitter laugh. He turned back to her and sat nearby. “It matters very little whether she is repentant Mrs Collins, what matters is that she has backed down a little, enough to leave you be for now. But also by a little I mean she still wishes you to apologise to her.”
Charlotte was angry that Lady Catherine still, despite the anger of her nephew and his persuasion, felt that she was in the right. “I shall do no such thing Colonel.”
He smiled at her, “And I would not expect you to, nor would I press the matter either. Unfortunately, I feel we must now allow some time to pass. I will continue to visit with you and dine in your presence, if you permit?” she blushed and nodded at him and she was pleased to see him smile at her in return. “And I would encourage Mr Collins to visit my aunt less frequently.”
“I am not entirely sure that would be possible Colonel.”
He laughed at the thought, “Yes indeed he is extremely attentive to her, is he not? However, I must speak to him on this matter. He must see his priorities lie with you, not that I mean he should neglect my aunt but that perhaps his visits should be no more than weekly.”
“I do not envy you the task of persuading him of that.”
“I will do my best Mrs Collins, for your sake.” He reached out and patted her hand.
She could still feel his touch on her hand a few minutes later when she realised he had risen, refilled his tea cup and taken another slice of cake and sat back down in an easy chair.
“Oh yes, Mrs Collins, I have just remembered!” he declared bringing her jarringly back to reality. “I received two surprising invitations this morning. Both from people I have never met in the entire course of my life! I am assuming that they are owing to you.”
“I assure you Colonel; I cannot think what you mean.” she replied, a puzzled expression on her face.
“Well, all the same I am happy to have accepted an invitation from…” he paused to remove the invites from his breast pocket, “Mrs and Miss Thomas, for an evening party tomorrow, and Mr George Simmons, to dine at Oak Wood Farm a week yesterday. There now, are you sure you have had no hand in these?” he asked teasingly.
“I confess, they are acquaintances of mine, however I had no influence. I do believe that Mr and Mrs Abbot may well be responsible, they too are invited.”
“Ah, there we have it! Mystery solved. Good, good!” he returned the invites to his pocket. “I must confess I am glad, after the spat I had with my aunt this morning, to be able to accept invitations to dine out.” A look of understanding passed between them. “Is Oak Wood Farm the old Tudor brick house on the road to Westerham?”
“Yes indeed, it is. I am told it was the seat of the old squires before the De Bourghs came into the area.”
“Oh I see. And is Mr Simmons descended from the squires?”
“I believe not. I think I heard Miss Thomas saying that Old Mr Simmons, the present Mr Simmons' father, had bought the place after the last squire had died leaving no heirs.”
They continued to converse amiably for some time and Charlotte found herself relaxing once again in his presence. Her earlier alarm, subsiding and becoming a mere embarrassment that she could easily hide. She did not understand herself and such thoughts, nor did she wish to explore them, but she was glad to be able to continue to be in the Colonel’s presence without discomfort.
Colonel Fitzwilliam after stating that he was glad to see her looking much recovered expressed his desire to speak with Mr Collins about his visits to Rosings and his own conversation with his aunt before he departed. Therefore, Charlotte led him to Mr Collins' book room and left him there to speak with her husband. She returned to the sitting room to think and to pray for strength and composure.
18
Mr Collins stood at the window of his book room and watched Colonel Fitzwilliam walk down the lane towards Rosings. The Colonel had been firm but kind in his advice to him, he had not become impassioned, nor did he speak to him as he would to a subordinate in the army.
However, what astonished Mr Collins the most was that he spoke to him as an equal. Lady Catherine was so insistent that Mr Collins knew his place and station in life and that he kept within it, that having bee
n spoken to by the son of an Earl and the nephew of his Lady patroness as though he were an equal mentally threw him off balance. His mind was drawing comparisons between the Colonel and his aunt and she came out severely lacking.
The Colonel's words about Charlotte reverberated in his head and it set him thinking.
A little over a year ago he had gone into Hertfordshire upon the bidding of Lady Catherine to find a wife. He had settled within himself that the best decision he could make concerning choosing a wife would be to choose one from amongst his cousins. He was well aware that he would be the means of injuring them and their mother upon the death of their father, when he inherited the Longbourn Estate.
He had at first, been drawn to the eldest Bennet girl, Jane. Her beauty was unsurpassed, but he had been informed by Mrs Bennet that Jane was likely to be soon engaged to a man of large fortune. This turned out to be true and Jane, he smiled to think, was happily married to Mr Bingley and they now both resided at Netherfield Park, close to her parents and friends.
He then thought with some bitterness and hurt of his second choice. The Bennet's second daughter Elizabeth. Now, that lady was fortuitously settled, married to one of the richest men in the land, and nephew of his Lady patroness. He was glad she was well married, and he had never wished her ill, despite her bruising his pride in refusing the offer of his hand. However, with hindsight he knew her words were true. He would never have been able to make her happy and she most probably would have not made him so either.
He sat back in his chair and remembered his quitting Longbourn in consternation and embarrassment and going to visit with the Lucases, where he began to see their eldest daughter Charlotte as the possible companion of his future life. Yet, recent events had begun to show Charlotte in a different more prudential light. He had married her because she was a sensible woman of good standing, not brought up too high and with a ready wit. Mr Collins now realised that although his head had made an excellent choice in Charlotte, he had never truly seen her real merits as a woman. He was now taken aback by the feeling of affection growing within him for his wife.